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August 8th, 2007

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March 18th, 2007

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February 9th, 2007

03:19 pm - hi guys... ummm... my grandma is hvaing surgery on monday... my grandma duca... i'm kinda scared... its a pretty long surgery... can you guys just pray for her? thanks. Current Mood: nervous

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February 5th, 2007

05:22 pm - how did this happen? i know its all my fault and i just feel sooo horrible! like i focused so much on being in akron and them when things with tom started that changed my focus to him...and now i look back and realize i have not made time for anyone else and it ruining my friendships...i dont even talk to half the people i used to...and over break i made myself so busy with working and family and going to see tom or having him come here that i didnt even get to hang out with some of the people tht mean the most to me...i miss everyone so much but i feel like i have just left people behind. i didnt mean to. i dont even know...this just sucks. Current Mood: depressed

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February 2nd, 2007

01:13 am - its been too long! so tonight i went to campus focus...its like our campus youth group thing! i loved it! it was soooo much like being at youth group at home...only no cathi, jenn, steve, brad, lauren, emily, mark, alex, geno, elyssa, and people i know i am forgetting...like danny carle who goes sometimes! actually it was like reallllly big but it was amazing! we sang songs and the first really hit me...it was about God bringing us back to him...which is exactly what was going on with me! but basically i was worried i wasnt gonna like this whole campus focus thing but i really do and i am gonna keep going! plus danielle, joe, matt hoffman, and shupp go so its like being at home kinda! lol! umm...other than that my life has been goin pretty good! classes are classes and astonomy is sucky...very sucky... believe it or not i am thinking about joining a sorority next year...i went and checked out sorority 101 and it kinda made me interested lol! we'll see! my boyfriend = AMAZING!! thats all...peace and love ya'll! Current Mood: content

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January 23rd, 2007

04:09 pm - PUPPY!!!!!! Someday this will be my puppy!!! Shar Pei's are ADORABLE!!! me and tommy saw one at the pet store and bascially if i didnt live in a dorm i would get one right now! lol!

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January 13th, 2007

12:25 am - can i go back to akron now?!? so basically... yesterday...well thursday cuz its now technically satrday...anyways...i picked up danny from school we hung out for a while and it was fun!! then i went to toms...we went out to dinner with his mom, her boyfriend tim, and his brother eric! eric is basically hilarious! he makes me giggle soooo much!! well after dinner we just back to tommys...last night had its good and bad points...only one bad point...i said something i shouldnt have to tommy got mad i was really just kidding and then he felt bad cuz i felt bad for saying it!! but he made me feel better when he said he would drive out to my house just to give me flowers...lol!! kinda a long story! lol! well anyway then this morning he made me eggs! i love when he does that!! he called our friend mike and was like "mommy and daddy arent fighting anymore...mommy and daddy are playing house!" lol! it was funny..mike always says "mommy and daddy are fighting" when tom and i argue cuz he is like our thrid wheel...lol i dont know maybe its a you have to be there thing. well anyway when i left toms i came home...did some laundry then talked to him online for a little and he kinda made me mad but nothing serious just kinda being a jerk and i told him that and he said he knew so thats good i guess...lol! then i went and hung out with kenny d! sooo much fun! twin bonding time!! lol! now i am procrastinating when i should be folding clothes and packing to go back to school...i am sooooo ready to go back! you have no idea! lol! what happened to you? i guess just a lot has changed the past few months! peace out homes! Current Mood: blank

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January 7th, 2007

10:53 pm - basically... so basically i ahve been thinking... What happened to who i was this past summer?!? i mean for the most part i am sooo super happy with where my life is and the ways in which i have grown...but... something is missing! the ONE thing that was the BIGGEST part of my life this summer! where did that go?!? Any guess as to what that thing is?!? a boy?! NO!! My tommy out does any boy i have ever liked/dated/whatever that was in the past! with the boy i could not be more happy! a friend?!? NO!! everyone who is important to me i still talk to and still hang out with! or atleast have seen! or plan to see!! Well what else is there? i'll tell you! God! i had this like amazing bond with him for like the whole summer and now its like not there! i mean sure He is still there but i grew apart from Him! i miss Him! i miss church! i miss feeling like when everything else is wrong i can pick up my bible and fix that! i miss feeling like i have a "church family" to come home to! i miss Elyssa! but most importantly i just miss God! i cant imagine what my life would be like if i hadnt been intorduced to WUMC! and honestly i have alex to thank for that!! so thanks kid! lol! it totally changed my perspective on faith and made me stronger spiritually! it just brought me so much closer to God and showed me how to have a relationship with Him!! i need to get back on path! i need to see Cathi, and Jenn, and Steve, and Elyssa, and Mrs. Knotts, and Mr. Knotts! basically those people right there helped me shape my faith in a way i never knew i could! They basically rock! i dont know where all this came from but it feels good that i typed all this out!! hope you enjoyed! lol!! Current Mood: pensive

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January 6th, 2007

01:17 pm - cursed?!? so i think i might be cursed when it comes to roommates... as we all know my roommate last semester did not work out...basically we were too different and i just couldnt deal with her anymore... so i got a new roommate...ashley...this girl who is like one of my best friends down there and i know i get along with and stuff...well right when everything is going well... she texts me the other day and says she might not be going to akron next semester...and basically i am all what the hell! why me?!? i was like the one person who was not worried about having a roommate i didnt know and everything went wrong for me! what the heck! and now ashley?!? i mean come on...throw me a bone here! dear God, please just let this whole roommate thing work out for me this semester! please let ashley be able to go back to akron! please!! love, Rachel! i want it to be like next year already!! i mean Nicki, CJ, JT, and Me!! all in akron!! its gonna be cool!! but i still ahve a whole semester to go! Current Mood: annoyed

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January 5th, 2007

07:11 pm - Cutie McCute Face!! i was calling tom that all day today...entertained me i guess lol!! so tuesday i worked and got to see nicki...she has been reallly sick :( wednesday i worked...shopped a little...then i went to dannys with megan ball! i am really glad i went! it was realllllly nice to see everyone!! i miss hanging out with those people! like it was weird to be surrounded by the people who made high school so amazing for me cuz i havent been with them in sooo long!! the last few months have been dedicated to akron and tommy and stuff that i forgot what it was like to be with those people!! i kinda wish ashley or kathy or someone would have been there that would have topped it off!! but yea it was fun!! me and megs had some good talks with people!! esspecially markie and well me and megan had a good talk with each other too lol!! thursday i went out to toms!! we went to crocker park and bought way to much at american eagle and i bought a shirt at hollister too...and now i am kinda broke again!! lol!! but i totally needed those jeans!! he took to me to the biggest target i ahve ever seen!! then we went home and watched wedding crashers...then we went to giant eagle cuz the two of us and eric (his brother) were hungry! i found build-a-bear gummies!! haha!! then we went to bed kinda early cuz we were tired!! we woke up this morning...or afternoon rather...around 1ish lol! then just chilled for a while till i went home :( i hate driving in the rain! now i have to get ready to hang out with CJ cuz i am totally procrastinating! lol!! and he just texted me and is getting antsy!! lol!! i want to hang out with people for the osu game!! and tommy will be here and i want people to meet him but i guess a lot of you already ahve plans so maybe we will just hang with CJ and AJ unless someone informs me of something different!! call me! Current Mood: bouncy

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December 30th, 2006

11:41 am - i hate getting in fights... i guess i have alwayas just kinda been a people pleaser...so when i am fighting with someone...i dont like...no no not at all! side note: i also realllly hate being sick... so yea i am a chronic people pleaser...when people seem mad at me i like want to stick my head in the ground and hide like an ostrich (sp?)...they are the ones who do that right?? well anyway but last night no one was mad me but i still felt that way because i was mad at the one person i hate being mad at....well i dont know if i was mad but more frustrated! i am just over this whole thing...like i dont want to hear about it anymore...i mean basically its this... sometimes part of loving is learning to let go and basically i think tom is getting that but i think she is having a little trouble! like i dont even know the girl and i feel like she is huge part of MY life and i kinda wanna be like GET OUT!!!! like if i was a bad girlfriend i would be like "dont talk to her, dont see her, dont talk about her" but i am not so basically i just think he needs to be careful as to what he says to her cuz i really think she doesnt get it...like she doesnt understand that its over...things just do not work for them...just doesnt! like i dont know i always like look down on people for doing this but i almost think that they need to just like not talk to each other anymore...at least for like a lonnnnnggggg time...they both need to establish their seperate lives...bottom line! like i know i always hated ending things with someone and then not being friends with them for a long time but i almost understand thats the way it needs to be for a friendship to ever be able to work...or at least i think so...cuz if you dont do that i mean like bad relationships pop up again because old feelings are still kinda there and you becaome jealous of people they are seeing...i dont know...but yea i get it now! i just feel like this is something i shouldnt have to deal with...i dont know...whatevs... i really have to go shower and get ready for work now... i hate being sick! i am working from 1-9:30 so if your at the mall i will personally offended if you dont come say hi! is it tomorrow night yet?!? Current Mood: cranky

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December 21st, 2006

02:47 pm - lets try this lol! these are the peoples whose phone numbers i want/need! - mandi - kathy - markie - danny carle - stephanie - nick grimm - shannie bowie and everyone else who i can not think of lol...please just leave me your numbers incase i ever need/want to call your pretty face!!! THANKS!!! Current Mood: bored

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December 20th, 2006

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December 19th, 2006

04:38 pm - i dont even know! i dont really know what i want to say so i am just gonna start typing and we will see what comes out...k?!? yesterday sucked...i mean capital SUCKED! i left tommy's house and was sad cuz we dont get to see each other that much since its break. came home got ready and my moms little holiday get together was not fun...i thought it would be but it wasnt (please reference previous post). then late late late i texted tom to see if he was still up and ended up having a conversation i didnt want to have...i mean we are ok its just...i mean i realize there will always be days in a persons life where they begin thinking about things they dont want to think about...its just i expect him to be able to deal with that and its like sometimes he cant...he says stuff like "this would never break us apart" or "you dont need to worry" but i dont feel that way because i know if there was one thing that could break us apart it would be this...that scares the hell out of me! i think i it kinda should too...i mean what we talked about last night is just not the kind of conversation anyone wants to have with their significant other...its just not! sometimes i almost wish he would just not tell me about these things but at the same time i feel like its good he tells me cuz it means he isnt hiding it. i dont know...he just means WAY to much to me to lose and sometimes i dont think he knows what he means to me. i dont know this could go on forever...maybe i should stop typing now...but basically...i NEED to see him...i NEED to be with him right now...and i cant be and that just sucks. i worked today....i was on stuffer for 3 and a half hours...aka my whole shift...didnt get my new phone yet...my mom says tomorrow...but thats what she said yesterday...i dont know...all in all...bad mood...i need to do something tonight...i need to get out... Current Mood: sad

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December 18th, 2006

10:14 pm - ever wonder... when your parents are going to start treating you like an adult?!? i do! my mom had her little holiday party tonight... we were playing a game and my mom was treating me like i was 10! but brandon, a bus boy at the cabin, who is a senior in high school... gets treated like everyone else... but do i?!? no! its just frustrating... and dad, stop telling me your going to quit smoking if your not. its simply annoying... and i hope you know after you smoke you smell horrid oh and please chose one personality... either be the person you are when no one is around or the way you are with them! also annoying... and just curious as to when you will trust me when i say... i am not having sex with my boyfriend!! i slept over his house last night and i kid you not... we put together a puzzle at 1 in the morning! its just stupid that i cant be trusted to be the person i have always been... i have morals and tom and i have only been dating for 2 months...almost... its just dumb... sorry for venting... on a happy note i think i am getting my new phone tomorrow! Current Mood: pissed off

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December 16th, 2006

12:53 pm - Back in good ol' Willoughby! yep thats right kids... i'm home!!! for a month!! i start working today... 7-11:30...possibly 4-11:30 if they need me! i hate holiday mall hours! dont you?!? lol i went shopping yesterday... exchanged toms shirts for a bigger size... bought his mom an ornament... got my brother a couple shirts... now i just need to figure out what to get my mom, nicki, and tiffany then i just came home and watched a movie... working late tonight so cant really do anything tonight... tomorrow i work 12-5...so yea maybe tomorrow i will get to do something! other than that not much is going on... i miss tom and mike already... and ashley c., and maggie, and laura but yea...free tomrrow night so call me!!!! new phone in a few days!!! RAZOR!!!!! Current Mood: bored

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December 10th, 2006

02:46 pm - its been a while! like 2 weeks since i last updated! so finals are this coming week...i only have 2 but they are both very scary! hopefully i do well on at least my chem one...precalc i am just hoping to pass lol! this weekend has been pretty fun! friday was a perfect day! ashley c. came and told me faren wasnt moving in with her anymore so now we are gonna live together. then ashley adams called and said she was gonna be in akron...then i went to chem and got a call from the people in the game room...i have an interview there on tuesday!! yay!! then i went and took my psych test and got a 90!!!!! then i went and saw ashley and her fam at starbuks! then the rest of the day was good too lol! saturday tom and i got in our first big fight so that was not fun lol! but we worked out it even if it did end in stupid tears that happened from a total misunderstanding lol! it was dumb! then we went to taco bell...then we threw snow at each other...then we went to zee's and saw maggie and laura and invited them bowling...then we went back to his room and chilled till bowling...then me tom maggie laura and mike went bowling but there were little kids having a birthday party so we had to wait but i played ddr and mike laura and maggie played pool...and tom just sat and watched me cuz he is too chicken to play! then i fell asleep realllllly early! now today is study for chem final day...so i am gonna go shower and then hop to that! see all you willoughby kids soon soon soon!!!! Current Mood: silly

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November 25th, 2006

06:50 pm - well its back to BABW... i kinda hate working there now but w/e... hopefully once i get my raise i wont hate it as much! lol!! its just the managers dont know how to manage... i want tania back!! so yea worked today then went x-mas shopping with ashley and michael f. super! we had fun and spent too much money...and we arent done! i bought all of toms stuff though so i am good with that... now i just need to buy stuff for... mom, dad, alex, toms mom, toms brother, michael super, nicki, and other people i cant really think of right now lol!! i am hanging out with danny carle tonight!!!!!! i miss him more than words can say! it should be fun!! i dont know what we are doing yet lol! thanksgiving was amazing... i love my family and everyone likes tom!! yesterday i went out to toms... it was fun as always! his mommy bought me a shirt from key west!!! i was sooo excited! now i am tired so i am gonna lay down before i go to dannys! bye byes! Current Mood: cheerful

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November 22nd, 2006

05:51 pm - hmm... its weird...really weird... ya know how when you go on myspace you look at one persons profile and then click on one of their friends and then one of their friends and so on... well i just did that with livejournal cuz i realized i need to add people to my friends list lol! well i got to this one persons...someone i am not even friends with...you can say i almost dont like them actually... but as i was reading this lj i wanted to be like "you have no idea how much i understand everything you just went through...thats exactly...down to the people it involved...exactly what happened to me" it hurt me to read it...to know that someone else had to feel that pain...just because i know what it felt like...like someone was stepping all over your life and ruining all your happiness! its amazing how people repeat their mistakes...and yes i think that what hurt me and this other person is just a huge mistake on one persons part...geez this would make so much more sense if i could use names...ugh... now its on my mind and kinda hurting...why does this hurt so much to look back on? i have someone now and i am sooooooooooo beyond happy! i mean i could go on for days with why he makes me so happy! basically he treats me 10 million times better than anyone ever has...basically! i dont know... i cant wait to see tom tomorrow... its been like 6 hours since i have seen him but... i miss him! have a good thanksgiving guys...remember all you have to be thankful for...cuz seriously there is so much! like i dont know thanksgiving always makes me think about that! lol! well have a good one!! peaxe out homes!! p.s. i dont know why but any like hurting i just mentioned...is gone now! lol!! i kinda took a break midway to talk to ashley on the phone so i am a lot happier now!! lol!! Current Mood: peaceful

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November 21st, 2006

03:42 pm - WTF!!!!!! ok so like i am super pissed right now...like you dont even know! ahhh!!!!! ok so yesterday my roommate, lauren, was like "hey your not gonna ahve to move out cuz i cant go here next semester i dont have the money" so while i felt bad i was like sweet...now i dont have to move!! i love where my room is...i am right across the hall from ashley and faren and next to maggie and laura! now i have to move all the way down by the bathroom...whateves...well thats what i thought! well talked to marsh...and he said i cant move into laura and jamellas old room unless i have someone to move in there with. umm...i dont have anyone i can live with...alissa moved in with arry, faren is moving in with ashley, laura and maggie are living together...and from what i know everyone else is happy where they are....CRAP!!!!!! i cannot...CANNOT...spend another semester in here...i dont trust her...i dont like her...i hate this room when she is here!! why do you think i am at toms constently...besides the fact that he is my boyfriend...i mean WTF...i cant even bring tom here cuz she makes it akward!!! WHAT SHOULD I DO?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? i am paying a shit load to go here and they cant even kinda accommadate my living situation....no not gonna fly...i have to get out of this room!!!!!!!! geez! Current Mood: bitchy

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